because If I send this all will blow up in my face

you do realize the longer you go without talking about this with me me the worse this will get, I have serious issues with your Dom getting to dictate what you do with me, remember I am kinda your Dom too, if he wanted something he should have come to me, if he took me seriously he would have. I have a bigger problem with you being not only ok with him doing it, but also being OK with closeting our relationship for personal gain and enforcing the hypocrisy in this scene. is this really what you want? I thought I meant more to you, I thought my intense hatred of drama you make you want to spare me more of it, If you had changed it to mentor instead of play partner, or even been willing to talk about it, but you did not, and you haven't, I hope you realize all I can do is wonder why....