so Gaelan sent jez a letter, telling her she is disrupting him primary relationship, I don't really know how to react to that, he is my Dom, but how does Jez know I had no idea it was sent until after it was too late

because If I send this all will blow up in my face

you do realize the longer you go without talking about this with me me the worse this will get, I have serious issues with your Dom getting to dictate what you do with me, remember I am kinda your Dom too, if he wanted something he should have come to me, if he took me seriously he would have. I have a bigger problem with you being not only ok with him doing it, but also being OK with closeting our relationship for personal gain and enforcing the hypocrisy in this scene. is this really what you want? I thought I meant more to you, I thought my intense hatred of drama you make you want to spare me more of it, If you had changed it to mentor instead of play partner, or even been willing to talk about it, but you did not, and you haven't, I hope you realize all I can do is wonder why....

grace periods suck

Alright Jez still has not called me, I know she has seen the message I sent her (asking to talk about the situation) but it seems to be going unanswered, I have to say if she is trying to make me break up with her she is doing a good job, guess I will just have to go play Minecraft, then I wont care about anything......except creepers,

relationship under construction

so my submissive sent me a message last night saying that her Dom "instructed her" to change our public relationship to "play partners" and that she agrees, because she needs to portray a more dominant dominate role in the kink community, and the hard truth I have to face is this:
in the greater kink community if you really want to be a "successful Dom" you cannot advertise your submissive side. the community is closed minded, and (hypocritically) oppressive, if her Dom had come to me first, or even if I had had a say in this, fuck, if she had changed my status to "mentor" I would not be so angry......
the hard truth she has to face:
I do not associate with those close minded ass hats for a reason and if all I mean to her is "a play partner" then I wont play, I thought I meant more to her then that, she has been dropping the L-word for the last few months, and I reciprocated for the first time only last week, we entered into this relationship with the knowledge that I have a really hard time committing myself to women because I have a bad track record with dating crazy bitches with tendencies ranging from cheating to stalking to attempted murder, and the first indication that I actually feel anything for her and I get demoted? by the guy she started seeing after me? At my encouragement? I have not negotiated with this man, he has not had my consent to dictate the relationship between her and I, if he really wants to make this a pissing match, that's fine, but I do not intend to roll over, just because he says so, and if they both really expect me to play this game, then I will just have to admit defeat and move on, I guess I just have bad luck with petty women

moving on

today is the anniversary of finding out the death of my lover bear, I have cried and burned for this enough, and now I must move forward, however that may be.